For the love of fear

Fear is a dark cloud that can limit, confuse and hinder the harborer. However, something also I have noticed about fear is that it can work as a safety device. Fear can feel like the only thing standing between you and your “nevers”, the only thing protecting you from getting eaten up. There is a love and protection that kicks in to maintain the fear if it's the thing you feel is keeping you safe.

Recognizing this is paramount for coming out of the cloud, establishing a healthier safety device, that doesn't suck all of your energy just in defense of your fears. All of your incredible dreams and desires deserve your power to be realized rather than stifled under fear.

So just let go of the fear, right!? Get over it. See through it. Hear what other people are telling you. ...but the thing is it can't always be forced like that.

When some well intentioned guides (friends, family, coaches, etc) try to just get your fear gone without you authentically understanding and feeling how you are safe without it, a couple things can happen:

  1) You may feel stripped bare and overcome with an even more intense fear to compensate and maintain protection

2) You may feel wrong and broken and want to feel good and whole so you will attempt to agree/comply without really understanding and prematurely jump ahead in your journey. Consequently you may end up suppressing the fear, not really eradicating it and the effort becomes futile or worse, masked.

Masking is covering something up, but telling yourself you handled it and don’t have to deal with it anymore. It’s like putting trash in a closet in the house of your heart. It rots. 

Taking time to objectively see the harm of your fear, but also deep compassion to see why they aren't so easily dropped will blend into healing some day when you're ready. This time cannot be forced on you by others. Sometimes life rises up and makes it time and sometimes it's a quiet moment that you know you're ready to try to start breaking through, on your terms, at your pace, with your discretion to turn around at any point.

When entering the space of our fears, compassion for yourself is essential. Love is powerful. Self love is powerful. So love yourself, even when you don't feel like you can ever let go of your fear. Love eventually can become the new safety and you won't need your fear anymore.